Today’s Good Friday. I had a great time helping out at the Maundy Thursday mass yesterday. Holy week has always been great if you are a catholic. Great masses one after another and also great tune made you feel very sad as we journey with Christ in His passion. Nevertheless I also feel terrible when it comes to my faith, cause I am constantly reminded that I am gay as well and in a way I am leading a sinful life.
Some people that I know gave up religion so that they can be gay without carrying any guilt with them. Still I find myself too hard to let go of my faith, having just embraced it two years ago. In a away I always feel that I am carrying a burden, which I think will always remind me that God knows how I feel and that in him I can find solace and comfort as I continue to lead a double life.
Latest update with KJ? Went to Rotorua with him at the end of February. It was a great trip and I just enjoy being with him, eat together, sleep together and the lingering hugs. Time is never enough for both of us and the two days could be the longest time we ever spent with each other without being apart.
Uni started again at the beginning of March. As usual I am back in uni, attending lectures and working on my assignments. For this semester I am taking French, something which I have meaning to do for quite a while. As I enrolled in the 101 class, which is for the absolute beginner, I felt like I am cheating because I have had some rudimentary knowledge of the language. I did a six-month informal course during my pre-u years and maybe because of the interest, I never really forgot what I learnt. Plus I did some downloads of songs and films (French gay films rock!) I have some idea of how words are pronounced in French. Then I did some online course (the French Steps) which helped a lot. Sometimes in class I became the guy who knew it all. Quite bad I know but I can’t help it. I enrolled in the class anyway because I want to be taught French formally. My tutors were French women themselves (one of them looks like older version of Carla Bruni). Quite enjoy the classes and hopefully can do well.
oh i have just found a new Fuck buddy (nothing interesting, a 40 yrs old queen i should seriously stop seeing) and also i join the uni LBGT club, but i have not been to any of the meeting yet. but will post about the fuck buddy and the LBGT club soon.
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